Olympics: Horny As These Games, Here's Where Our Aus/NZ Athletes Should Be Focussing Their Attention - YKTR The Mag

Olympics: Horny As These Games, Here’s Where Our Aus/NZ Athletes Should Be Focussing Their Attention

Call The Hotline and leave Simi a message, for all your relationship advice needs and he might just play them live on the Jordan’s Room podcast

Far out man, apparently these Olympic villages get pretty raunchy, respectfully.

And I love that. Imagine the sort of shit that goes on there…stamina of doom too these athletes holy cunt…anyways.

I know Covid is going to put up a few barriers to these athletes coming together during the games, but love always finds a way man.

So I thought I’d put pen to paper today and help our Aus/NZ representatives navigate this year’s Olympic Village – specifically athletes from certain disciplines they should be targeting;

This is for male and females too, respectfully 🙏🏼

Synchronised Swimming

I’d also group the divers into this category, but I’d be keeping my eye out for the synchronised swimmers in the cafeteria if I were there.

Why? rhythm.

You know those swimmers have a few things going for them; coordination, timing and they work well in groups.

If I know one thing for sure, it’s that people who choose to spend most of their life under water are normally the freaky ones. Trust me.

Weightlifting

Hey man, when in Rome.

This might be one of the few chances you get to sleep with someone who can clean and snatch you – why not take it with both hands.

Don’t be that weird guy that never sleeps with a woman stronger than you, what are you afraid of? insecure bastards.

Pentathlon

Yeah, you don’t know about those Pentathletes aye – thank god I’m here to help.

Pentathletes compete in fencing, swimming, a bit of show jumping, some more fencing and then a laser run.

A real jack of all trades these guys/girls, so it’s pretty much a lucky dip – you don’t know what you’re going to get.

Plus they come in all shapes and sizes too, so there’s something for everyone.

Rowing

Bit of group sex never hurt anyone.

If you’re into that type of stuff, go the rowers man.

Heaps of endurance, and they work well as a team too.

You want that single sculler, doubles maybe? shit maybe you want to jump in with the whole 8-man crew and get weird?

I’m not judging, do your thing.

Be the coxswain of your own orgy.

BLOGGER BIO
The man behind the Jordan's Room podcast and regularly features on YKTR Footy Companions. As scat as they come, and responsible for all the dog emojis currently landing in girl's DMs.

One thought on “Olympics: Horny As These Games, Here’s Where Our Aus/NZ Athletes Should Be Focussing Their Attention

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



RELATED NEWS

SPORTS, POP CULTURE, LIFE & BUSINESS

If Moses is in that mood, Parra can beat anyone.

Subscribe to The Scope Podcast to follow along with all your NFL action. So the last two weeks Skip has focused on a couple of rookies he likes heading in to the 2021-22 season. Which can be really hard …

YKTR MAG NEWSLETTER



BECOME A YKTR MAG MEMBER

EXCLUSIVE DEALS, ACCESS TO PREMIUM ARTICLES & MORE!

YKTR MAG NEWSLETTER

COPYRIGHT YKTR THE MAG | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

POWERED BY SYDNEY DIGITAL GROUP