The Little Things: Easy To Follow Guide For How To Keep Baby Girl Happy, Outside Of The Bedroom - YKTR The Mag

The Little Things: Easy To Follow Guide For How To Keep Baby Girl Happy, Outside Of The Bedroom

Contrary to popular belief, I do my best work outside of the bedroom.

Honestly, that’s where the little things matter the most.

It’s an area I don’t feel you young kings out there apply enough attention to.

So I’ve broken things down here into three simple categories, and given each scenario a few different examples – ‘cos I know you rat bags need shit broken down for you.

Here’s a few, simple ways you can impress that special someone outside of the bedroom – we ’bout that long game you know, so this shit is important.

New Flame

Right, let me paint a picture for you.

You’ve just met this girl, you’re sleeping together but nothing too serious (yet), but obviously you want to make sure she knows what you’re about.

Again, these are just little things but they go without saying – and mean a lot.

Dinner. If you can’t cook, that’s fine.

But don’t smash Maccas in your car while listening to Drake on the way home from training or work, and turn up at her place full, saying “nah I’m sweet for dinner, but you get yourself whatever you like”.

That ain’t it.

Pick up dinner on the way home so it’s waiting for her when she gets home after work.

Take the rubbish out.

Don’t wait ’til the cunt is overflowing either, do it while she’s having a little sleep-in or she’s in the shower.

Unload the dishwasher.

Same thing, just do it when she’s busy doing something else. And in both cases, don’t sit there all smug looking for a pat on the back.

Stay humble. Just take the bloody initiative – it’s the little things.

Baby Girl

Now we’re in that mid range – where we all know Scope does his best work.

You’ve been together a year or so, and things can start to get a little routine’y.

This is where the little things matter big time.

Easy one here, do the shopping.

At this stage you should know what she likes right? surely.

Fill the fridge with all her favourite snacks while she’s out for the day, or working a bit late.

We’re also past the honeymoon stage, so it’s time to her with that spontaneous weekend away.

She’s been working real hard. She’s stressed. Long weekend coming up, take her to the Hunter Valley.

Wine tour and hot air balloon ride, kiddies shit.

Or if that’s a bit expeny, no worries.

Get her a little day spa voucher for her and the girls.

She takes the girls along, get a little foot massage, old mate digs right into those toes I was licking all last night – fuck she was kicking like a mule too.

But I digress…


The little things matter here, more than at any other time in a relationship

See when you’ve been together a long time, shit gets comfy.

You get lazy, and the first thing that falls away in a relationship is the little things – the effort plays, to use a footy analogy.

You start to leave dirty towels on the ground, shit with the door open.

You expect her to do everything for you – it’s 2021 man, that ain’t it.

Outside of just chucking the slow cooker on before you leave in the morning, food is an area you can really treat ya girl nice.

Book a cooking class together.

Or better yet, order a little chef – a little Japanese guy to come around to your place and teach you and another couple how to make sushi.

Get old mate throwing bloody shrimp across the lounge into her mouth – that shits hot as.

Maybe get naked and make love on the canvas, covered in paint, spice shit up?

Anyways I’m getting carried away… outside of the bedroom.

Old reliable goes a long way, because it works.

Give the girl her flowers man. Make it vibey.

Steal from the neighbour’s garden if you have to.

A girl should flowers every week, not just ‘sorry flowers’.

– Simi

The man behind the Jordan's Room podcast and regularly features on YKTR Footy Companions. As scat as they come, and responsible for all the dog emojis currently landing in girl's DMs.

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